Easy Peas-y

I spent 4 hours today having dental work done, and the entire right side of my face is still numb.
In my misery, I decided to make soup.


Totally yummy split pea soup!


- I small bag of dried split peas (slightly over 2 cups) sorted for rocks and other non yummy things
- 8 or so cups of broth (I used chicken. Canned for time. 4 cans.)
- About 1/2 cup of diced salt pork and/or bacon (I used half of each.)
- 1 Tbsp butter (or olive oil. I recommend butter. Always.)
- One large onion diced
- 3 garlic cloved minced
- 2 stalks celery, diced
- 2 large carrots diced
- 2-3 bay leaves depending on size
(I don't measure my spices/salt/pepper/herb additions, and rather opt for taste... But this is the gist of the soup).
- 1 tsp Thyme
- 1 tsp Marjoram
- Nutmeg - just a smidge!

- Salt and fresh ground pepper to taste
- Heavy cream, optional
- Parsley - mostly to make it look pretty!

Saute the pork bits with butter in a large pot until pork bits are brown and crispy and you have a slightly scary amount of pork fatty goodness in the pan. Remove browned pork bits. Reserve pork fatty goodness.

Add onion and garlic, a pinch of salt and pepper, and as much pork fatty goodness (This is a hearty soup. Ignore calories for now, I promise you this is rich and delicious and you won't need to eat very much anyway.) as needed to coat the pot and make sure the onions don't stick and burn. Caramelize!

Once caramelized, add carrots and celery. Saute until fairly soft, then add spices, bay leaves, split peas, and chicken broth. Simmer until tender.*

*I didn't pre-soak or parboil (boil for a few minutes in water first, then drain off water and cook according to recipe), so while boiling at first then simmering, my batch took a little over an hour.

Once at the consistency of your choice serve, or...


Whip out your good old fashioned immersion blender and churn that sucker until at desired consistency. I left mine 2/3 creamy. You can also let cool a bit then process in a blender.


I also added a dash of heavy cream at the end for extra creamy richness. Check and taste again and adjust seasoning!


Top with reserved crispy pork bits, chopped fresh parsley, and homemade* croutons! Yum!

* I made my own croutons, as I can adjust the type of bread and seasonings, and they're just overall much better than any store bought kind. Just dice a baguette or any bread of choice into half inch or so cubes, then bake over low (300 degrees F) until crunchy. I toss mine with chopped herbs, namely parsley, melted butter, and kosher salt and pepper, then return to the oven to add a nice golden color.

French Kissing

For my 21st birthday, I wanted lots of pink, lots of glamour, and lots of cocktails. Everywhere.

This drink encompasses this, and it's absolutely delicious. Yes, it looks girly, but men like it too, and will openly drink it in public.

The French Kiss
1 oz Chambord (That delicious French raspberry liqueur I talked about in the last post, that also makes fabulous sauces)
1 oz Vodka
1 oz creme de cacao (I use the light one)
1.5 oz Half and Half

Shake with ice and strain into a martini glass (Or even a tumbler. It still looks chic.)

Et voila!

Valentine's Day!!!!

(Pretend that it hasn't already happened, like, a million years ago.)


So this year, since I found myself joyously not alone and/or quite possibly drunk on this most hallowed day, I decided to make a special meal for the sweet man who dared to date me. Surf and turf is a great happy medium when you can't quite decide what to serve, and the options are endless.

A Valentine's menu for sexy boyfriend:

-Crabcake stuffed portabello mushrooms
-New York steak with Herbed Butter
-Fettuccine Alfredo with Jumbo Shrimp
-Heart Shaped Red Velvet Cakes with Cream Cheese Frosting and Chambord sauce

We also had some fabulous Italian strawbery prosecco with chocolate covered strawberries for a pre-appetizer. And a really good riesling during the meal. Both from Costplus World Market (They often have 90+pt. wines on sale for like $10 a pop). Also pretty sure I had a baguette at some point. Maybe. I like to throw that into the mix on every possible occasion.

New York steak with Herbed Butter
Now, I don't much like getting into steak politics, as every man woman and child cooks his or her beef differently, to different levels. But let's just say, for my steak, I rubbed some salt, freshly ground black pepper, and olive oil into a few strip steaks, grilled them to medium rare (or rare, since I had planned to reheat those puppies), and I was done. Right before serving, I placed a bit of herbed butter on top and let it melt all over the steakes. A-ma-zing!
Simple steak is happy steak!

The herbed butter adds a freshness to the steaks, and enables you to really taste the meat without shielding it like steak sauce does.

Herbed Butter -Finely chopped herbs of choice (I used parsley, tarragon, marjoram, and tyme) -Stick of butter (1/2 cup) softened -Salt to taste, moreso if using unsalted butter -Freshly ground pepper Mix the herbs, salt, and pepper into the softened butter. Place in the fridge until needed. On to the next dish...


Shrimp Fettucine
Oftentimes when I'm having shrimp alfredo, the seafood and creamy cheesy flavors don't seem to unite well. The shrimp tastes like shrimp, maybe, and the pasta tastes solely like the alfredo. This is bad when everyone else at the table picks out the shrimp for themselves!
This recipe ties both flavors together quite nicely, so even the shrimp-deprived can enjoy this classic dish.

1/3 cup olive oil
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 lb. shrimp, peeled, deveined, tails removed
2/3 cup. clam juice (key ingredient!)
1/3 cup dry white wine (I like pinot grigio)
1 cup heavy (whipping) cream. Make sure it's not sweet!
1/2 cup freshly grated parmesan cheese (plus additional for serving)
2 tbsp. lemon juice 2 tbsp chopped fresh parsley
1/4 tsp each dried basil leaves
1/4 tsp dried oregano leaves, crushed
1 pkg linguine pasta, cooked and drained

Heat oil in large skillet over medium-high heat. Add garlic; reduce heat to low. Simmer until garlic is tender. Add shrimp in same skillet and cook over medium-low heat until opaque (Cook as little as possible! Overcooked shrimp is like a car tire. You only want to infuse the shrimp with garlicky-goodness, and bring shrimpy goodness to the pot.) Remove shrimp; reserve liquid in pan. (See?)

Add clam juice; bring to a boil. Add wine; cook over medium-high heat 3 minutes, stirring constantly. Reduce heat to low; add cream, stirring constantly. Add cheese; stir until smooth. Cook until thickened. Add shrimp to sauce. Heat lightly. Add lemon juice, parsley, basil, and oregano. Pour over linguine in large bowl; toss gently to coat. Serve with additional grated Parmesan cheese, if desired.


Red Velvet Cake





Okay, I cheated, but I simply didn't have THAT much red food coloring, so I used the boxed kind... ...then used a 5in. heart shaped cookie cutter to cut out the heart shape. Then, I sprinkled powdered sugar liberally over the top, with my sifter. For the cream cheese frosting:

• 1 pkg of cream cheese softened at room temperature
• 1 box of powdered sugar
• 1 stick of unsalted butter (or margarine), softened at room temperature
• 1 tsp vanilla extract

Beat the cream cheese and butter together, then slowly add the powdered sugar a little at a time. Emphasis on "a little". Mix in the vanilla extract and you're finished, hun!

UNLESS, you want elegance, and thus, a Chambord sauce is in order!

Chambord is a delicious raspberry liqueur from France, and the key ingredient in one of my favorite cocktails, known by many things, including a "French Kiss" (in another post). Here, I simmered it with actual raspberries, and sugar. I strained out the seeds, then added milk chocolate chips, sugar, and the tiniest dash of heavy cream. I apologize for having no idea whatsoever the proportions I used, as I was experimenting with sauces and that tends to happen, but I can assure you that it would be hard to botch, and the result is absolutely amazing!


For the dishes I had forgotten to photograph in my haste of getting cute for the night, I've found similar images online that should convince you to try them:


Crabcake Stuffed Mushrooms
Costco has these GIANT trays of portabello mushrooms, but the mushrooms themselves aren't the huge portabello mushroom size, nor at they the small, button mushroom size. They're the stuffin'size. I scrape out the stalks (save them!) and innerbits, and they're ready for something yummy inside.

Crabcakes
-1 pound fresh mushrooms, approximately 35-40 (It makes a lot but they're delicious and will disappear very fast, I swear.)
-1/4 cup celery,
-finely chopped 2 tablespoons onion,
-finely chopped 2 tablespoons red bell pepper,
-finely chopped 1/2 pound crab meat (Since pressed for time, I used the canned variety, but if you really want good eats, go for dungeoness or snow crab meat, hand picked)
-2 cups oyster crackers, crushed
-1/2 cup Cheddar cheese, shredded
-1/4 teaspoon garlic powder 1/2 teaspoon Old Bay Seasoning (a MUST for Maine-beckoning seafood endeavors)
-1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
-1/4 teaspoon salt
-1 egg
-1/2 cup water 6 white Cheddar cheese slices

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.
Sauté celery, onion and pepper in butter for 2 minutes, transfer to a plate, and cool in the refrigerator. While vegetables cool, wash mushrooms and remove stems. Set caps to the side and finely chop half of the stems. Discard the other half of the stems or use elsewhere (might I suggest, cream of mushroom soup from scratch). Combine the sautéed vegetables, chopped mushroom stems and all other ingredients (except cheese slices) and mix well. Place mushroom caps in individual buttered casseroles or baking dishes (so they're touching, but not overlapping). Spoon about a tablespoon of stuffing into each mushroom. Cover with more cheese. Bake for 12 to 15 minutes until cheese is lightly browned. Yields 6 servings.

This is an appetizer, but they're pretty filling so make sure you save some room for the main course.



And lastly,



Chocolate covered strawberries
So simple. So romantic. So elegant.

• 12 oz. good-quality milk chocolate chips
  


• 2 Tbsp. butter


• 1 quart fresh strawberries, washed and dried

  You will also need a baking sheet and waxed paper

You can go about this two ways:
Melt the butter and chocolate in the microwave or melt them slowly over a double boiler. I opted for the latter, as I don't trust my microwave sometimes, and feel as though he's trying to sabotage many of my meals. The double boiler option lets you watch your chocolate more closely so it doesn't burn, and melts smoothly.

Once you have melted chocolate, take a strawberry by the stem and dip, dip, dip. They look best when a hint of red shows at the top. Once coated, lay the strawberry on the sheet of waxed paper to cool. This might take some time, but it is well worth the wait. These are DELICIOUS!



So this concludes my meal. Yes, I was tired afterwards, I won't lie. But I also made enough for 6 six hungry people - my family, my gluttonous self, and the boy. I've made parts of the meal many times since, and it never ceases to impress the crowd.

After the cold...

I have finally returned from my long haitus that was due to my frustration at not being able to de-fuglify my blog. Phew!

I have several major food holidays to post about, including Valentine's day, St. Paddy's day, and Drinko de Mayo, as well as many other topics in which I hadn't forgotten to photograph!

"How to Find a Good Husband."

I've been cooking since I was 4 years old. I helped my grandmother in the kitchen, usually doing the bitch work, but it was that very bitch work that turned me into the disciplined cook of today, and the only person my age I know who can actually cook (This baffles me). That side of my family is from the dirty south, and down there, it is an absolute crime and sin against humanity to not know how to cook (well), and back in my grandmother's days, everything was made from scratch, handmixed and kneeded and just stuffed to the brim with love and butter. Anyone can cook, but it also takes practice, boldness, and a pinch of talent to be great, and it helps to be a supertaster biologically. I've used my efforts and skill to show my love for people through food.

I think that everyday should be Thanksgiving, not so much in the gluttonous sense, but in that we should all share our food and stories and laugh over a glass of good wine. The past few Thanksgivings, a holiday I consider "The Olympics for Cooks" I decided to let my family relax, and avoid accidents with my new knife set in the kitchen, and cook the whole meal myself. My grandmother, the master in my eyes, proclaimed after a few bites, "You will find a good husband because you cook so well!" Oh, 1940s Mississippi.

I took it as an amazing complement.

If anything, I've found that men can be coaxed into things when presented and stuffed silly with an amazing meal. I'm just saying...

Few recipes I hoard to myself, but most I share, and teach others, and will happily post here. I hope my blog will educate and entertain you, and encourage you to cook and try new things and take chances (I've gotten food poisoning countless times, but it was worth it.) and love, because real food, real good food is made with love.

What You Talkin' Bout Willis?

The Veggie Monster?! Wt$&*@%&!
I like my spinach and all, but this makes me a little sad.
(Especially since I made some chocolate chip cookies last night at like, 1am. Hehe oops.)

après des holidays.

It's a bit late for a holiday post, but seeing as I have only recently started my cherished food blog, I decided to post this now!

Closeup of my X-Mas tree

To me, the holiday season means food, more so than family and presents and all that jazz. I show my love for the people I love through food, so after finals week, making gift baskets for Christmas!

I still smell of chocolate.

But the outcome was adorable, and I like any culinary feat that requires using a spice grinder*.



I wanted to make traditional holiday time goodies, that didn't taste so stale and boring, so I created the majority of these:

- Chai Tea Gingerbread Men (Fresh ground cardamom seeds are MUCH cheaper than preground and the flavor is to intense!)

- Cinnamon and Rose flavored Sugar Cookies (I used Indonesian rose paste from an Asian market which made the cookies the most fabulous shade of hot pink!)

- Caramel Apple Cake (So delicious you could cry. Easy to make for begining chefs. I taught the boyfriend, and he made it for his mother. So cute!)

- Aztec Hot Chocolate Mix (Ground chipotle peppers and real Mexican chocolate were among the ingredients)

- Lavender Lemon White Hot Chocolate Mix (I know too many people who only like white *pretend* chocolate, so I created this little mixture which was to die for! I found powdered lemon extract and it gave the mix quite the kick.)

- Pistachio Dark Chocolate Fudge (People fought over this. Fudge really is so much better when made from scratch, y'all!)

- Almond Butter Crispy Cookies (Martha Stewart Recipe. One day, I wil be her. Or Oprah. Or Martha and Oprah combined.)


Caramel Apple Cake
(Not my recipe, so I'll tell you, because EVERYONE should know this.)

1½ hours | 30 min prep

SERVES 12

• 3 cups flour
• 2 cups sugar
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 3 large eggs, beaten
• 1 cup vegetable oil
• 2 teaspoons vanilla
• 3 cups finely chopped apples
• 1/2 cup apple juice
• 1 cup chopped walnuts (I omitted these!)

Glaze topping for cake

• 1 cup brown sugar
• 1/4 cup butter
• 1/3 cup whipping cream

1. In a large bowl combine flour, sugar, soda and salt. Make a well in the center and set aside.
2. In a medium bowl combine eggs, oil, apple juice and vanilla. Stir in apples and nuts. Add the egg mixture to dry ingredients, just until moistened.
3. Spread batter in a greased and floured 9 x 13-inch pan. Bake at 350°F for 45-50 minutes.
4. In a small saucepan combine the brown sugar, butter and cream.
5. Cook and stir till bubbly and all of the sugar is dissolved. Cool slightly. Drizzle warm sauce over cake, when it has cooled for 5 minutes, so it can seep into the cake, keeping it moist.

And boy is it moist! And I even hate that word, and only use it sparingly.

(*Note: Grinding dried chiles is fun and dandy, and produces amazingly strong flavors, until you open your spice grinder and inadvertently snort chipotle. No bueno... Be careful!)